Best Friends Muscular Garfield and Thanos Enjoy Christmas Together
by UglyTurnip
Summary: Years after his encounter with the Avengers, Thanos enjoys a peaceful Christmas with his best friend in all of the universe: Muscular Garfield.


Thanos whistled to himself as he leaned back comfortably in his recliner. It had been a few years since the destruction of half of the universe's life, and he had taken it upon himself to retire in peace, settling into a small cottage home on Earth. It was a wonderful planet, though it was still no Titan.

Christmas had come around once more. Thanos liked Christmas more than any other holiday from any culture, because Christmas was all about sacrifice and giving. Granted, Thanos didn't have a lot of people to sacrifice things for anymore, given how he had accomplished his goals, but there was still one friend he had accounted for, one individual that would certainly turn up at his front door.

His name was Garfield, and he was a muscular, handsome, lasagna-loving tabby cat. The two of them had met at a local gym just months after Thanos settled in, and the pair had been inseparable ever since. They had traveled the world together, for Garfield was a world-reknowned stock broker, and Thanos had the riches of countless space adventures stowed away under his mattress. As for Christmas? They spent every holiday together, for they were bros of a most impressive caliber.

 _Ding-dong!_

And there he was. Thanos sprung up his recliner and stepped over to the door, throwing it open with a big, genuine smile on his face.

"Garfield, buddy!" Thanos exclaimed at the sight of his closest friend. "How are you?"

"Pretty good," Garfield said casually. "Can I come in?"

"Oh, of course," Thanos confirmed as he stepped back. "Come inside, pal; lunch is ready for you."

Garfield did as he was told, finding a comfortable seat on the couch as Thanos brought in two plates of homecooked food. One of them was Garfield's favorite- a very saucy lasagna. The other contained a few small sandwiches intended for Thanos. Garfield happily began to dig into his lasagna, eating slowly and savoring the flavor.

"Say, Garfield, I'm kinda glad you're here," Thanos said as he munched on a sandwich. "There's something I need to talk to you about, something on my mind."

Garfield paused, noticing the tension in Thanos's expression. He frowned, but continued eating. "What's the matter?"

Thanos sighed. "It's about what I did a few years ago with the Infinity Gauntlet. You remember what I told you, right?"

"Yeah," Garfield sighed. "Steve from Human Resources just faded out of existence right before my very eyes. You told me about it before, remember."

"I suppose I did," Thanos conceded. "But it's been troubling me a lot more than usual, lately. I dream about the Avengers now, much more than I used to. I hear Tony Stark's voice. He asks me if it was worth it in the end, if destroying half of everything has made the universe better? He asks me if I'll wipe out even more life once it breeds enough. I never even thought about it that way. What if I have to spend the rest of my life having to cull countless others? What if I am merely playing God to a people that will never understand the risks they pose to themselves and others? Am I even meant to have such power? I am beginning to have my own doubts about the sacrifices I've made. I'm sure that I've even ended close friendships like ours, just with the snap of two fingers."

Garfield was a wonderful listener, though one would not know this unless they spent a long time around him. Garfield had a tendency to stare at others with half-lidded, lazy eyes, indicating that he neither really paid attention nor cared if you called him out for it. However, the opposite was what was really true. Indeed, as Thanos ended his ramblings, Garfield merely offered a gentle smile.

"It's OK, Thanos," Garfield assured, patting his friend's shoulder lightly. "I don't want to even pretend that I understand what it feels like to be hated by almost everyone, but you should also remember that you're not alone. In time, people will see your good intentions, and though they may never be able to let go of the deaths of their friends and loved ones, they will understand why you did what you did."

Thanos smiled. "Thanks, Garfield. You're a great friend, you know."

Garfield nodded. "I think I do. Truth be told, even I have some misgivings about your actions, but I would never leave you on your own, buddy."

Thanos was not exactly thrilled to hear this revelation, but he understood Garfield's position. In any case, Thanos loved and cared for his dearest friend.

The two continued to eat, sharing more pleasant topics of conversation, until at last they had finished their meals. Every last bite of lasagna was now comfortably sitting in Garfield's gut, and Thanos had just one sandwich left.

Garfield yawned, stretched his arms out, and leaned back. He patted his rock-hard stomach in satisfaction. "That was a great lasagna, Thanos. You know how to cook."

"It's always a pleasure to have friends to cook for," Thanos said with a wink. "In any case, I find that I am not nearly as hungry as I thought I was. Would you like half of my last sandwich?"

Garfield thought about it. "I think I have enough room."

They both laughed, for they knew that Garfield always had room for delicious food and good friendships. Thanos snapped his fingers, but instead of killing half the universe, the sandwich was merely divided into completely equal halves. It was a perfectly-balanced split, as all things should be. They ate silently for a bit, savoring the flavor all the way, until there was nothing left.

"I think it's time for presents," Thanos said as he rose from his recliner.

Garfield's eyes sparkled with delight. "You got me something?"

"I did," Thanos informed as he bent down and retrieved a small present from underneath the Christmas tree. "It's not much, but I think you'll like it."

Garfield took the present from Thanos and gently unwrapped it, revealing a picture frame with borders emblazoned with little lasagnas. There was already a picture inside, one of Thanos and Garfield when they went to Miami beach. They stood on the shore, clad in matching swimsuits, as the sun set on the horizon behind them. The frame was a great gift on its own, but the happy memories that the picture unearthed were of immeasurable value. Garfield nearly teared up, but he was too manly to allow it.

"Merry Christmas, Garfield," Thanos chuckled.

Garfield beamed. "Merry Christmas, buddy. Thank you so much!"

"It's no trouble at all."

Garfield reached into his pants pocket and pulled out a large stack of bills, placing them into Thanos's hands. "You know, I've never been good at deciding what people like. I know it's not as thoughtful as the frame, but will the money suffice?"

Thanos shuffled through the bills, his eyes widening with shock. They totaled $100,000.

"Garfield," he stuttered. "This is a lot of money. . . Too much."

"Nonsense!" Garfield laughed. "My stocks have been splendid this year, and I don't mind sharing my wealth with you. Merry Christmas, amigo."

Thanos sighed, but ultimately grinned. He still thought it to be too much money, but he knew there was no point in arguing with Garfield, especially on such a wonderful day as Christmas.

Garfield paused, then he suddenly snapped to attention, as if a sudden realization had sprung to mind. "Hey, I have some really bad movies I bought at the bargain bin a few weeks ago. Do you wanna just sit back and mock them with me?"

Thanos grinned from ear-to-ear. "I wouldn't have it any other way, Garf."

And so, Garfield retrieved his movies while Thanos microwaved a few bags of popcorn. Then, the two of them sat back to watch Tommy Wiseau's _The Room_. It was an enjoyable movie, if for the wrong reasons, but what was even more enjoyable was the time these two friends spent together. That was the true meaning of Christmas. Sure, the material possessions given and received are nice in their own right, but they pale in comparison to the joy of spending time with those you care about.

 ** _The End_**


End file.
